Are you - Single, Taken, Playing the field, In Love, Looking for Love?
I guess 1, 3, and 5 above. But mostly 1.

Any Tattoos/Piercings?
No.

What event in your life made you cry the most?
I think I've transcended crying and moved on to long-term low-grade depression.

What movie/TV series do you know every line to?
Honestly, I can't think of any. But boy do I know Firesign Theatre albums inside out. That really dates me, huh?

Last time you were drunk?
Actually, really drunk? Hugging the toilet as it spins drunk? It's been decades. In my 30s, when a hangover went from a single day of misery to two or three, it just didn't seem worth it any more. But let’s see, I did have three or four beers watching Les Fossoyeurs a couple weeks ago. But the effects of that were probably as much from being up till 4:30 in the morning as much as drinking beer.

What's your favourite smell?
Fresh coffee!

When did you wake up today?
I think the cats let me sleep till the alarm went off at 7:30. Usually they start getting rowdy about an hour before that.

Have you kissed or been kissed by anyone in the past week?
No. Damn the luck.

Have you ever talked to Tom?
You mean the legendary ghost of MySpace? Everyone's friend? No. Has anyone? Does anyone really want to?

Most embarrassing memory from the past 6 months?
Nothing comes to mind. Probably a case of ignoring or misunderstanding somebody, making them feel bad.

Most regretted memory from the past 6 months?
Same thing.

Best memory from the past 6 months?
Getting to know the Venus Envy women. I just love them. Out of nowhere I suddenly have three wonderful friends.

Do you have any love interests at the moment?
Despite my use of the word "love" above, no.

What do you think about the most?
"What am I forgetting to do?" What's going to bite me in the ass if I don't take care of it right now? I have far more projects up in the air than is healthy.

Where was your last date?
The Nelson Art Museum, then Bo Ling's for Chinese food.

What's your favourite food?
Probably Indian, though I’m pretty fond of food in general.

Have you ever gone to class drunk?
No. Why ruin a good drunk?

Are you still friends with the people you knew in middle school or high school?
Not really. Eric's the only guy from high school I still know, and I haven't seen him for several years.

Are you afraid of commitment?
Anyone in their right mind is afraid of commitment. The thing is, you commit anyway and hope for the best.

Are you hungry right now?
Nope.

Are you open and honest or do you tend to keep your feelings locked up?
I try to be open and honest, except when my feelings get locked up.

What's one of the dumbest things you've said?
“This should be easy.”

Plans for today?
Since it’s 11:30 pm, I’ve given up on plans for today. Tomorrow and the next several days, it’s all about revising my portfolio site for the freelancers’ showcase next week. Except I also have to meet a new client, revise a couple of current clients’ sites, and play a gig out of town.

What are you doing now besides taking this survey?
Importing music into iTunes (Milla The Divine Comedy [so-so] and The National Boxer [rocks!]). Also figuring out which of my recordings to put on the website.

So there I was in divorce court. It was interesting what an assembly-line procedure it was. All the cases were with the same lawyer, to speed things up, I’m sure. The first couple cases involved other lawyers and were basically a matter of setting a later date with the judge for what I guess would be more of a trial. Then the routine cases started up, 20 or 30 of them. The lawyer had advised me when I checked in with him that I was next to last.

Most of the marriages had lasted only a few years (mine was one of the few with a date before 2000), though one couple had been together since 1993 and another since 1984. A few couples came together and seemed civil to each other. Two or three women brought guys I’m guessing were their current boyfriends. The case whose announcement snapped everyone to attention was “John Smith vs. Jacob Smith.” When the judge read the particulars, it was “John Smith vs. Jacob Smith, formerly known as Jennifer Smith.” Ah, I see. John Smith seemed like a nice guy who had been through a lot, though I’m sure I’m reading more into that than was really visible.

It was interesting how people reacted when they received their papers and left the courtroom. Some were relieved, almost happy. Most of the women were sad, the guys about 50/50, I suppose. How did I look? I don’t know. I do know I cried on the drive home, tears running down my cheeks and not caring who saw it. When you get married you don’t think it’s going to end, but of course it does, one way or another, as everything must. At least when I got home there was an email from Elise, telling a funny story about something that happened earlier. That made me feel better, to know we’re still friends.

I’ve been going through the house, cleaning out stuff she left behind, to send to her or give away. As it happens, tomorrow I have a routine colonoscopy (I know, TMI) so today I’m on clear liquids and laxatives. By the end of the week, at the new moon, I’ll be squeaky clean, inside and out.

It’ll be a new world. What kind of world, I don’t know. But it will definitely seem new.

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden fell to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

There are many reasons why American media have done such an appalling job of covering this war: news departments concerned only with the bottom line keep cutting back on overseas staff, the idea that extremely complicated issues must be reduced to bumper sticker-sized sentiments, the way real substance is constantly trumped by celebrity worship and the pettiest of personality quirks—it goes on and on.

Of course it doesn’t help that our government is lying through its teeth for political motives, both as a CYA move and to bolster support for an attack against Iran. In a related post on his own site, Professor Cole says administration claims that the (nationalist) Mahdi Army is a tool of Iran “is like calling the Minutemen vigilantes in Arizona tools of the Mexican government.” Muqtada al-Sadr’s group’s whole purpose lies in rejecting outsiders like the US and Iran. Who do the Iranians support? The al-Maliki government, which US troops helped bail out a couple weeks ago in Basra as they tried to defeat the Mahdi army. So we are helping the Iranians even as we attack them verbally, and quite posssibly prepare to attack them militarily.

I almost wrote that attacking Iran is one of the few things that could make the situation in Iraq worse, but of course reading Cole’s articles illustrates there are many, many ways it could get worse, and almost certainly will. We’ve landed with both our big flat feet in the middle of a hornets’ nest and done nothing but kick and flail blindly for five years. What happens now? Whether we stay or leave, we’re going to get stung, and I fear, stung badly.

The coolest thing, which I had the least to do with, is Charles Barsotti’s cartoon blog at the New Yorker—he’s the Cartoonist of the Month for April. He will have a new image up every weekday all month long. Please be encouraged to send him email about what you think. He’s been working with one of those Cintiq monitors, the ones where you actually draw on the monitor rather than a tablet, and it has resulted in a radically different style from what most people associate with him. Personally, I think it’s cool as hell, but I’ve worked with him for about twelve years now and he’s a good friend as well as a client. And he never fails to crack me up.

All I did on that project was to provide some technical help and help translate one side to the other.

Another project is a revamping of Doug Medlock’s voice talent website. The boy is poised to do big things. Art work and audio are by Doug; I just put things together into a Flash site.

Finally, the Dorfman Plumbing Supply website redesign went live last week. Plumbing supplies don’t sound very exciting, but these guys do high end spa equipment (as well as about everything else) and their showroom is a thing of wonder. There are a couple parts of the site that are still waiting for content, but you can get the idea. I did the design and built everything; photography is by the incomparable E.G. Schempf, whose normal stock in trade is photographing art for museum catalogs.

We now return you to my usual ranting and raving.

[future]
One gigantic problem caused by the Bush administration (of which the telecom amnesty I’ve written about so frequently is just a tiny part) is its claim of the unilateral power of the executive branch. Over and over the administration has claimed that the Congress and the courts simply don’t matter. Though occasional articles and books are written on the subject, it has gotten far too little public examination. This American Life ran a program, called The Audacity of Government, about some of the bizarre lengths that even obscure parts of the executive branch have gone to in order to assert raw power (it appears it is not yet available as a download—check your local NPR station or subscribe to the podcast).

So far, the government has gotten away with it mostly by invoking the Scary Terrorist Threat. But you have to wonder how conservatives who have been comfortable with the Bush pose will feel if that unchecked power is wielded by, say, a Clinton administration. And you have to wonder how, even with presumably the best intentions, a new administration will feel about giving up the power grabbed by their predecessors. Governing is hard, and it is tempting to grab every tool you think you can use.

On the matter of signing statements, for example, a process by which the President says “I don’t care what the law says, I’m going to do what I damn well please,” both Obama and Clinton have said they will not rule out using signing statements. McCain says he will not use them, but as the This American Life program points out, he’s got some wiggle room. Besides, McCain’s positions on nearly everything have wiggled like a weather vane over time. Have you noticed how he’s easing up on even the question of torture?

[am I dreaming?]
Like many other people, I feel the last eight years has been a Kafka-esque nightmare and look forward to January 2009 when we can finally wake up. But I’m afraid, like the Nightmare on Elm Street movies, every time we think we’ve awakened it may turn out to be just another iteration of the dream. Sometimes life is a little too much like a B movie.

And then of course there’s this: 6 Signs the U.S. may be heading for war in Iran. Just in case you were feeling too confident about the future.